Once we realized that egg donation in the United States was not something we were comfortable with, we refocused our efforts. I buckled down, determined to find more affordable options and did what arguably I do best: research.
A search for more affordable options for IVF and egg donation yielded countless resources abroad. I feverishly read and explored many links. One link in particular, http://www.fertilityclinicsabroad.com, provided a wealth of information and resources for medical tourism. I was able to locate numerous facilities at a much more reasonable cost than here in United States. The prices range from $6,ooo to $12,000 dollars.
In addition, I utilized a Facebook group for women struggling with IVF and http://fertilethoughts.com/ in the hope that I might find other Americans who had either explored or used facilities overseas for medical tourism.
Information overload presents its own challenges. There is the fear of the unknown. How do we know where the best place to go? How do we know who to trust? Compounding my efforts was Jeff skepticism. How could I convince him that this was something we should seriously consider?
I took my new idea with information on three countries (Spain, Russia, and Czech Republic) to therapy in the hopes that this might be the forum to flesh out our discord. Surprisingly, our therapist was also unsure about going overseas. Her concerns, albeit valid, upset me. In my eyes I was alone, and I feared that her concerns would only fuel Jeff’s uncertainty. Ironically, it was me who was resistant and hesitant to the process early on, now Jeff was putting up road blocks to every idea that I presented.
We left therapy that night with a plan. Jeff’s job was to research the medical standards utilized by the clinics abroad, and look for any other viable options overseas. I on the other hand, was ready to move forward and began emailing the various facilities in an effort to set up Skype consultations with the three clinics.
I honestly believed that we had hit a wall that could not be torn down. I began to believe that we would never have a child. I was upset and did not know where to turn or who to talk to. In my mind, the person I trusted the most on this earth was resistant, not listening or really considering my new option.
The oyster was closing it shell and taking my hopes and dreams into its underbelly.